The book of Unreliable Darjeeling Memoirs – penned by Rob McCaffrey

Darjeeling CC v The Avengers CC

Saturday 4th March 2017

Skyline University Sharjah

We bowled great… And they kept running themselves out, till one pair ended up at the same end and began a fight between themselves , as to which one was actually out, which lasted twenty minutes .

It didn’t seem that anyone really knew the rules ,  least of all the umpire and then it degenerated into the nearest thing to a proper fight I’ve ever seen on a cricket pitch with their bloke on the verge of tears and hysteria telling everyone to fuck off then trying to fight our opening bat who politely and completely understandably….told him he was an utter cock and to get off .

It seemed their team are used to this kind of behaviour as they ran on like the Keystone Cops and literally had to drag him back . He was no Tony Bellew let me tell you … More Tony Bellend .

It took ten mins and Kissenger like diplomacy to drag this madman off the pitch…

Chasing 134 to win ….Ash …. In Brearley like … left field … intuitive mode ….asked this bloke who no one seemed to know …or had seen play …to open .

11 overs later … It was all over with him 81 not out off 39 balls . Left handed and made Ben Stokes look like Chris Tavare … He battered (the only verb that does this justice) the ball to all parts of Sharjah. And I mean battered and I mean all parts .

As the teams shook hands , the knob who was trying to fight in the first innings came over to have another go making an even bigger prick of himself than before .

My little lad Joe asked quietly if he could over and punch him and although tempted , we set sail for Dubai.

 

 

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